Some days it’s better just to stay in bed, this day seems to be one, of course, any day where it doesn’t top 30 degrees its’ better to stay in bed. 17 seemed to think I’d benefit from chatting with her at 7:30 this morning but as soon as I roused myself enough to take in what she was telling me, her ride showed up & she had to leave to go to school, the gist of it was that she’s now officially stuck in the art class she didn’t want to take at the beginning of the year, I told her back then that she should opt out early but she didn’t listen & now she says she’s got to write a detailed summary of what she hopes to create during her semester of independent art.
I warned her, it’s probably a good thing that she had to leave because I was on the verge of saying ‘I told you so’ she knows she doesn’t like this teacher, she knows they have a personality conflict & yet she still persists in staying in the class- crazy if you ask me. Though of course, no one did! I find though, that it’s one of the few drawbacks of talking to your kids as though they were competent adults & actually listening to their opinions on things, it makes them expect everyone to do the same. Then, when they run into someone who expects unquestioning obedience & silent attention & acquiescence, well they clash with them.
I have similar problems at work, I am extremely accustomed to being in charge, making my own decisions & not asking anyone’s permission for anything, I do not take kindly to being told I have to take my breaks at this specific time, or that I have to do this first, even though I know that fixes the customer’s problem more quickly.
I’m sure if I did ever have a live in guy it would lead to similar problems, I eat when I want, wash the dishes (or delegate one of my ‘minions’ to wash them) when I want, I shower, do laundry, read, clean, sleep all on my own schedule (or as the though occurs to me- which is really more accurately how I do things really. I do like doing things my way & I know if I had a live in boyfriend or new husband who had opinions on how stuff was done, or couldn’t tolerate clutter when I’m not in a cleaning mood, or was watching TV when I wanted to. Might just drive me nuts now!
Today was quiet though, I slept a few more hours, dragged myself out of my warm bed to light the heater & started up the dryer & the washer to get yet another load of laundry finished. Before I could make breakfast for myself 17 text-ed to remind me of a ‘thing’ at the high school tonight, which she insisted we had to go to ‘because it’s about college’ I hate going to things at the schools, I’m not from here & most people are & so know each other from school & all. I also had a feeling as to what this whole thing was about & tried to tell 17 we didn’t need to be there.
I messaged back & reminded her that I can’t take any loans to help her at college, especially with the car now, on top of the house, I’m over extended, the child support from the ex will help (assuming it continues past this month) but I’m still going to be doing overtime to cover us even after they end the mandatory 4 hours a week we’re on right now. (ends this Friday as a matter of fact- but not for me)
She insisted that this meeting wasn’t about that at all. I told her it most certainly was. & we argued back & forth via text for about 2 hours (I wasn’t just doing that, I was scanning pictures, editing & posting on The Fretting Zoo, intermittently with reading & commenting on other blogs & reading email- I’m a loser, I have so few emails that matter- even my mother rarely writes)
Finally at 1:30 I decided if I was going to run errands in peace I’d better go do it. So I took 2 of the kerosene jugs & went to the store, I sat in front of the pump at our local store, thinking about paying $3.49 a gallon for 10 gallons worth of kerosene, or driving another 12 miles, getting cash out of the bank, going to the Harvest Moon in peace (you read that: sans kids) & paying $3.29 a gallon for the same 10 gallons of kerosene, since I’d be driving more miles, using gas in the car to save the $.20 cents a gallon for the kerosene I probably broke even, but that’s what I did anyway.
After filling the bottles- which slipped & slid on the plastic bottomed trunk all the way to town- I was a little worried, the bottles wouldn’t stay still & I don’t want my new car to smell of kerosene – not a pretty scent by any stretch of the imagination- I located the bungee cord which had been holding the trunk on the old car shut & bungeed the jugs together & then hooked the hooks on the bungee to the luggage stow hooks in the seat. I was very proud of myself, made a mental note to keep the bungee in the car for the duration of the cold weather & bought myself a sobee in celebration.
When I arrived home I went to unhook the bungee cord & it snapped out of my grasp & hit my left index finger right on the first knuckle, drawing blood & making the finger stiff & painful all day long! Not such a bright idea after all- if I wasn’t so clumsy maybe all would have been well.
I wasn’t sure if 11 was beginning her remediation for math today or not- I thought so – I had signed the slip on Saturday, but she hadn’t said one way or the other for sure, at 3 though, the school bus drove on by & so I knew I had another hour of peace & quiet to enjoy. Just as I was leaving 17 showed up on her bus & rode with me to pick up 11 & 8 at the school, we went to check the mail & came home to find 17’s bf here, he had agreed to stay with 11 & 8 so we didn’t have to drag them to the high school for the college bound ‘thing’ which 17 was still insisting wasn’t related to financial aid or to getting the parents to take out loans for financial aid.
Since I had the extra money I took us all out to Subway for subs, where I encountered the son of old friends working behind the counter, 17 of course, knows him & his brother but I rarely see them, I’m always amazed when I encounter this 6+ foot tall hulk of a guy who I remember being 4 & having a hair cut with a tail at the back. When 17 & I first moved to Floyd in 1993 we lived in the same apartment complex with this guy’s family & all hung out a lot (I also knew his parents way back on my first sojourn to Floyd in 1987)
So, as I mused about time flying & how long it’s been since I first came to Floyd & tried to balance my checkbook 17 & the bf teased Mr 8 by ‘stealing’ the cookie from his kid’s meal when he wasn’t looking & pretending they’d eaten it without him noticing. When he got it back & started eating it we all decided it looked really good so I sent 11 up front to buy a cookie for everybody.
It’s funny how every kid is different, 17 still hates to be sent into the store or up to the counter like that, even if I offer to pay for a soda or something for her, she doesn’t want to run in & let me stay in the car. 11 was offering to go instead of 17 when she, 11, was only 5 & 17 was 11! Miss 11 just loves to run into stores, do little errands & check the mail, both here at home & at the post office in the box. She has just recently ceded that last job, at the post office to Mr 8 who is just about as into doing stuff like that as she is.
After dinner 17’s bf took the little ones back to our house & 17 & I ran by the library so I could get a new book on tape & to kill a little time as it was only 6:30 & the thing at the school didn’t start until 7. We arrived with about 5 minutes to spare & went in to find that one of 17’s oldest friends was there with her mother, we sat with them which was nice, though 17 & her friend were distracting each other with writing back & forth etc in stead of listening.
I was right, this was basically someone from the nearest community college doing a walk through on the financial aid application & explaining that if a child isn’t 24 yet & doesn’t have a child of their own or isn’t married, they’re still considered the parent’s dependent (never mind that you can’t get tax rebates for them past age 17, as they explained to me last year when I had my taxes done, my refund this year will be approximately $1000. less because she’s 17 now. (2 weeks from today she’ll be 18 as a matter of fact!)
They certainly took their time explaining every. single. line. of the form, I had the one for 17 filled out before he was done with page 1. (well, except for the actual income & tax information because I have to wait until 2/1 to even start to have my taxes done- & that’s only if I can get the w2 printed out at work on the 31st) 17 wrote me a note at 7:45 & said that her friend’s mother had said she’d only stay until 8:30 & so we could walk out with them at that point if I wanted. Of course, I wanted.
A quick stop at the grocery store for milk & a few other ‘necessities’ & we went home, 17 drove home, her first time driving at night, she did very well though a little slower than the posted 55 mph speed limit, but being a Tuesday night, the roads weren’t crowded so it wasn’t bad.
Showering in 22 degree weather when the heater is 2 rooms away is always a daunting proposition & I wasn’t looking forward to it in the least, but of course, work tomorrow & I can’t go in there without having a shower! After shivering through that & the hair drying process I listened to 17 tell about the art project she’s decided to start with during independent art – a glass wind chime & about her government class, in which the teacher brought them registration applications because the deadline is soon, apparently, kids who will be 18 before November are allowed to pre-register so they’ll be able to vote in the November election -&, in 17’s case, the February primary too. I am really glad she’s that interested in the political issues & is actually looking forward to voting.
Am I Half Dead or Am I Doin' fine? 