My 20 Minute Lunch

The first thing I have to say is the HR department at my job is insane. They’re not just a little weird, they’re totally nuts! When I got to Work on Monday my first task was to check out my payroll stuff & sure enough the W2 was there. I asked my boss’ boss (my boss being otherwise occupied, at home, with frozen well pipes) about getting the W2 printed by our payroll department, or my supervisor so I would have it to go to H&R block first thing this morning & he, being a manager, emailed the payroll people & we waited half the day for a response.

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Finally he came by & told me that I could go to our HR department, use the computers we’re supposed to use to sign up for payroll deductions etc & print the W2 from there. I asked if I couldn’t just ask payroll to print it because they could have it done in about 30 seconds & I don’t know much about the printer system at work He told me no, payroll can’t print them because if everyone asked payroll to do so they’d never get their real work done. I wasn’t too thrilled to be spending my lunch doing this, but I thought, hey, I’ve got an hour lunch, even worst case scenario I should still have 45 minutes to eat & visit with my co-workers.

So at lunch I walked back there to do that very thing- things would be so much easier if I had a printer which worked. I have an ink cartridge for a non existent printer & 3 separate printers, none of which work at all, one needs a specialized Hewlett Packard power cord & all of them need ink. When I arrived one computer was in use, the other 2 were set up for job interview stuff- tests for prospective employees to take etc. Nothing about payroll or anything else was evident on the screen so I walked around the little half desk & asked the first HR person I saw about it.

He said he’d do it on his computer for me, pulled up the payroll site & I put my id & password in & we pulled the pdf of the w2 up on the screen, he told me to click print & then he walked over to the printer, I asked: ‘OK to close this up?’ & he said sure, so I did, then we waited. & waited, waited, waited nothing was printing, he pulled the site, I put everything back in & he hit print again, no change, he re-did it & tried sending it to another printer. This didn’t work- that printer wasn’t printing either.

So we went to the computer I wanted to use in the first place, he changed it from new employee, to the regular employee stuff & we tried the whole thing again, 3 more times! It wouldn’t work at all! So he calls over another HR person, they try the whole thing again, sending it to different printers, trying different configurations. At this point I was 15 minutes into my lunch hour & starting to get a little irritated.

Another HR person walks by & asks what’s going on, they explain & he says- ‘oh you have to send it to this other printer! That’s the only one that works’ So we stand around & they try it again, and again. Still nothing is coming out of any printer anywhere. Meanwhile, while they’re discussing the whole thing my boss walks up, tells me all about his water pump & pipes freezing, walks over to payroll & she gives him a couple of checks. Then he walks back to me & hands me one!

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I was a little surprised because though I knew they had set up 2 checks for me this week (my sick pay from being out last pay period for a day had to be done on a second check because they weren’t sure how to process it) But I thought they’d direct deposited the check for 1 day’s pay in my checking account along with the rest of my paycheck. I was a little upset when my Boss told me no, this is the sick pay check, because I thought that money was in the bank & had written checks on that money!

Meanwhile the 3 HR buffoons are still bumbling around like the keystone cops, finally the last one to join the party says, lets go have payroll print the W2, I tried to say that the Manager had said no, I couldn’t do that. They said, if we ask her she can. So off we went to her cubicle, where she said she wasn’t supposed to, corporate was monitoring how many W2’s she printed & proceeded to ask, did you try that printer? Did you try the other one? Did you do this, that & the other thing for all the things the HR people had tried.

Once we convinced her that it wasn’t happening with the other 3 printers she called our IT department, where we all stood around listening to her chat with the IT people about someone’s kid for a few minutes & then explain that they needed IT to come fix the printer. Then we went through the whole spiel again. Did we try this? Did we try that? Finally IT told payroll to just print the W2! She immediately responded with the whole Corporate is watching thing. IT told her to blame it on them & I finally got my W2! 40 minutes into my lunch hour!

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These are the people who are responsible for making sure we’re protected, covered, being treated legally & PAID and it takes 4 of them plus an IT person on the phone to get one W2 printed. The whole thing is making me tired & aggravated right now & I just can’t stand to think about it any longer! Tomorrow, I’ll tell you all about my busy day off & how Miss 17 tried to kill me (& others) today!

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