As I mentioned in my last post, I had issues with my lovely Jeep Compass. They were serious engine issues, my ex’s guesstimate as to what it might have cost to fix the problem was between 2 & 3 thousand dollars. The Jeep dealership was actually less optimistic than that.

I was already considering the Salesman’s comment about replacing the Compass with another car when I said I didn’t find it funny last Thursday morning. Friday I went in to talk to them about it.

Long story short I am the somewhat reluctant but very relieved owner of a 2009 Jeep grand cherokee. It is HUGE. It is very white & it is coming with a very large payment.

However, I didn’t have the money to pay for the repairs the compass needed, I didn’t have the money to pay for the tires the compass would have had to have had by January to pass inspection, they were able to put what I owed on the compass (not an inconsiderable amount at all, let me tell you) into the payment on the cherokee, they combined credits for taking a 2009 after the 2010s were released with loyalty credits & multiple other credits that they didn’t exactly explain to make it a work-able situation.

I like the way the new car sits up so high, and the Sirius satellite radio (which I’m already familiar with because the company I work for has Sirius music channels in its lineup for your listening pleasure & the kids & I all often use them at home when doing something which we’d prefer to have music with (house cleaning is the #1 thing I do while listening to Sirius in my house I admit).

The car is not as roomy in the drivers seat area as the compass was, which surprises me as it’s a lot bigger everywhere else. If I hadn’t gone from the drivers seat of one to the other I would think I was crazy, but I’ve got to lose weight to drive this car comfortably (not exactly a bad thing, I admit).

It is so freakin’ huge I feel like I am going to drive over things, I’ve also seen it do a few odd things in the lights system, I was driving home the first night & suddenly although the high beams light on the dash was on, the headlights were on low, I flipped them back to low & back to high & they were high beams again, also the first & second nights, my front right turn signal didn’t work, the light on the instrument panel for the right turn flashed rapidly which is a signal that one of the outside lights is out & so when I got home I tried them & found it was the front right. Then, the last 2 nights though, the right turn light worked fine!

I certainly hope I don’t have a car built on a Monday when the workers were hung over or a Friday when they were all in a hurry to get the day over with & go home! Loose wires seems like the most likely reason for this, but of course everything is sealed up so I can’t even see any wires to check, let alone check them & of course because both issues are no longer going on, it’s useless to take it to the dealership.

Along with the new car payment I have a new insurance payment & of course, here it is the last month before renewal so I have a great big payment to make on the insurance just for October, then in November it will be spread out between the 6 months payments like normal.

The younger kids like the new truck a lot (the compass seemed more like a car, although it’s considered a medium size SUV, this thing seems more like a real truck- handles like one too) They like anything new & different is part of the situation & the back seat is bigger & has a slide out cup holder which I like due to the disgusting mess they’ve made of previous back seat cup holders.

Ms 19 is less excited, she is concerned because her BF read online that they get horrible gas mileage, this is the first 6 cylinder car I’ve ever owned (the ex & I had an Iroc with an 8 cylinder for a winter once, but I tried to not drive it more than I had to- he had trouble getting it started on many a cold morning & would spray ether in the carburetor & the image of the mushroom cloud like fireballs which would come off the top of that engine scarred me for life).

So I wasn’t expecting much in the gas mileage department, the paper stuck to the window glass said 13 city & 20 highway which was concerning, but of course, twisting mountain roads are neither city or highway & I’ve had cars I thought would do great do horribly & cars I thought would be terrible get great mileage here.

The compass had a read out that gave an MPG average read out & before it started having engine trouble it averaged 27-30 MPG, after it started having issues & running on only 3 cylinders it averages 23-25 MPG, still better than this cherokee I admit, but the cherokee is doing pretty well for what it is, it’s MPG readout like the compass’ one showed 18-19 the first half of the first day & it’s been between 19 & 21 every day since then, not too shabby considering the size of the truck & the size of the engine.

One great thing is that although my plates still renew in December, this car’s state inspection expires in April, this is good because I’m more likely to have money to replace tires then & do any other repairs which are required like brakes etc in April than I am in December which is when the Compass’ inspections expired.

Oh & the very best thing about this new car? It has a lifetime warranty on the drivetrain. As the lead mechanic at the dealership said, if what happened to the compass’ engine happened to this car, it would be covered, at most I might have to pay $100.  That, I can affort.

The ‘weekend’ (can’t really be a weekend if I’m working from 10 to 3 tomorrow can it?) began fairly early this morning when I made sure ms 12 got up to go to school – called the school to say mr 9 wasn’t going & went back to sleep.
The Doctor’s office called me back at 8:15 to say the doctor usually is at the local nursing home (where ms 18 works) on Thursdays but if we could come pretty soon she’d see us before going over there.
So we got dressed mr 9 ate toast in the car & I made my breakfast stuff & we ate/drank in the car on the way there & were in the office at quarter to 9. They soaked his foot- checked it out & decided it needed stitches.
Dr O talked with mr 9 about the stitches while she was doing them & gave him a shot to numb the area- now- 3+ hours later he’s pretty much numb there still.
We went to the grocery store & picked up much of the meat we’ll be eating for dinners in the next 2 weeks including a nice roast for Christmas (Turkey once a year is more than enough for me) Now if I can just get the roast the right amount of cooked – as in keep the center nice & rare but not get anyone sick from it!
It looks like We’re going to be going to Chrissie’s daughter’s chorus Christmas recital tonight. That should be fun-even ms 18 is thinking about going with us.
Right now I should be making mouse ornaments & so will let this be for now.

Christmas is the gentlest, loveliest festival of the revolving year – and yet, for all that, when it speaks, its voice has strong authority.  ~W.J. Cameron

This is a day which I’m sure- we’ll look back on & laugh. Someday.
Right now it’s not at all pretty & I’m sure before the week is over I will be stark raving bonkers.
Work was ok- busier than it has been just lately. I came home planning on making cookies because mr 9’s class Christmas party is tomorrow- ms 12’s is Friday & I thought the cookies would keep.
We had a lot of fun making cookies- we made rice krispy treats- easy fudge- chocolate chip cookies & our butter cookie recipe which we used for both simple butter cookies & pepermint & chocolate pinwheel cookies.
I wanted to keep the butter cookies simple- as in roll it into a bar- cut pieces off & bake. Mr 9 wanted to make cookie cutter cookies- which I really don’t like to do- a lot gets wasted & the more you roll it out the tougher the dough gets so the last few cookies are not so good (of course I’m too cheap or frugal to just throw the dough away)
After much debate I split the half of the dough which wasn’t for pinwheel cookies & gave mr 9 about a third of that half to make his cookie cutter cookies.
That was just fine- except that he dropped a cookie cutter while he was making his cookies & didn’t pick it up on his way to the oven to take cookies out.
So then- a little while later- on his way back to the washer & dryer (where he was making his cookies) he stepped on the cookie cutter he had dropped- he stepped hard & now has an inch long gash in his foot.
We cleaned him up & debated what to do next. It is a deep cut but it was already 8:30 by then & of course- since late August the kids don’t have insurance any longer (In March they’ll have insurance through their dad but it’s a long time until March) So I didn’t want to take him to the emergency room.
Ms 18 stayed with him- his foot wrapped in a cloth & elevated. Ms 12 & I went to the grocery store & got big bandages & some anti-bacterial cream with pain killer in it.
I’ve already called our doctor’s office (who will accept payments from me for his care) hopefully they’ll call me first thing in the morning & fit mr 9 in bright & early-I have a feeling it’s going to require a couple of stitches.
Mr 9 is taking the whole thing quite personally- the cookie cutter happened to be in the shape of Texas (my mother lived there for awhile once & bought a lot of things in the shape of & about Texas & gave many of them to me) So now he hates Texas!
He is quite upset about missing school tomorrow this is the kid who has 2 weeks of- beginning after school on Friday & is mad because they don’t have a half day Friday! I found out though- that his upset is not due to scholarly activities it’s  due to the Christmas party.
Cookie baking pictures are below.

He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree. ~Roy L Smith.

I say vacation because it was the first day I’ve been home from work at all since the end of February – when I reluctantly used my rolled- over paid day off from last year – because I had to or I’d have lost it. Having May 25 off was like a mini-vacation- even if it did mess up my overtime pay.

On Saturday after work 18 & I hadn’t agreed on what we were going to serve to eat. I had planned to have a cook out & burn our brush as a bonfire party sort of thing- but my ex moved to Oregon & I didn’t want to try to have a burn without another adult around. Also- the house was in total disarray from the work which was still in progress. Nothing was finished & everything was a mess still so having many people over was sort of out of the question.

Finally I decided that it would be best to just do strawberry shortcakes for dinner. 18 was a little skeptical but I persevered & went & bought the strawberries- bisquick & whipped cream. 11 & I sliced the strawberries & mixed them with sugar on Saturday evening. Everyone slept late on Sunday morning & we had a pancake breakfast. 18 was freaking out from about 11 am forward because she had to be there at 12:30 pm for a 2pm graduation ceremony & she insisted that we should all be there from then onward because she had heard that it was always crazy before & after graduation.

18- the BF- their friend A- left a little before noon to pick up 18’s friends V & B & take them with them to graduation. 11- 8 & I waited a little while before leaving because I knew 11 & especially 8 wouldn’t be able to sit still very well. We drove into town with no problem. However when we got to the road leading to the high school’s drive way the traffic started- I took an early left & went to the elementary school- because the high school & elementary are close together & share a parking lot. We found a great parking space & walked over to the high school.

There were people being seated in the auditorium where they had set up a live video feed. The kids & I got flyers with everyone graduating’s name on them but went over to the new gym after a quick stop at the bathrooms. We were told at the door that there wasn’t much of any room left in the gym for seating. I said I wasn’t going to watch my oldest graduate via video feed & they let me in to try to find a place to- at least stand- the kids & I found a place in the back somewhat behind the bleachers against the wall because I knew I wouldn’t be able to stand for 2 hours if I didn’t have something to lean on.

We settled against the wall & I checked my phone to see what time it was & found that I had a text message from someone I didn’t know. It turned out to be 18’s friend B who said to- when we came in- head toward the front- center seats- that they’d saved us some. We headed forward- earning ourselves some glares & found V-B-A & the BF all in a row with 3 seats for the kids & I saved in front of their seats.

Thus ensued a half hour of chaos- trying to keep 11 & 8 entertained & still. Worse was yet to come because then- at 2pm the seniors entered & I was hard put to keep 11 & 8 busy- in retrospect I should have asked 18 to leave me her cell phone. Because the bejeweled & Zuma games I have on my cell phone kept one kid busy- but I had to mediate arguments on who got the game next & how long they each could have it- whereas if I’d had 2 cell phones I could have listened & watched the graduation with my full attention.

Really though- the principals speech & especially the superintendent’s speech were fairly routine & sounded like they knew them by rote. I asked A- who is a recent graduate of Floyd Co. if it sounded the same as what he heard when he graduated- he admitted he didn’t remember. We sat in the middle of the gym- we had great seats! Thanks to the BF & A who had saved them for us. Because of my center row seating I was able to see everything.

I was amazed at how many faces I knew. It still amazes & amuses me to live in such a small town. I knew at least half the people in the crowd & I have never been to a PTA meeting (not bragging- though I hate the whole group thing & am well pleased that most of my work schedules have been such that I’m not available to go to PTA meetings) When I was a kid I could go to a town event (the fireworks & carnival they had on & around 4th of July for example) & I’d barely see anyone I knew at all- to see someone I knew was an event to be remembered- of course- now when I go home I see familiar faces every time.

In the stands on May 25th I saw women I’d worked with at my current job & in the clothing factory I worked in 8 years ago.  I saw guys who had played softball with my ex & run rescue squad calls with him. People who I knew from the stores & through Colleen from both 1993 & 1994 & the first time I came here back in 1987. (I saw Colleen later on -after the graduation- in the crowd. )

They handed the diplomas out & we all filtered outside- I – in a throwback to my father’s ideas when I was a child & a teenager (dragging him to concerts)- insisted that we sit in the chairs & wait until the majority of the crowd was outside before we went out- much to 11 & 8’s dismay- they were very restless.

We tried to locate 18 & her crowd but they were not visible- I called her & they found us because we were standing under a tree. we took a bunch of pictures of 18 with everyone & then I took 11 & 8 home. 11 & I mixed up shortcake mix & when the teenagers arrived we put them in the oven. Everyone seemed to enjoy the strawberry shortcakes very well. Then they decided to go swimming. (the young crowd that is- I wasn’t about to do so & 11 & 8 were rather annoyed with me that I wouldn’t go.

They found something else fun to do & I settled down in the hammock to read my book for awhile-when I first got in I overbalanced & fell right out the other side of the hammock- only my pride was bruised – but that was quite enough & I sulked & read for a little while- soon enough 11 & 8 found me having peace & quiet & felt they had to do something about that- as in they got in the hammock with me & we all talked for an hour or so.

The ‘big kids’ came back around 8 laughing because they’d gone ‘chunky dunking’ When I asked what that was they told me they’d all gotten naked in the river where they’d been (not on a back road either- in full sight of a fairly main road) & because all 3 girls could not be called svelte they decided it couldn’t be called skinny dipping so they re-named it chunky dunking.

I didn’t expect this to be the sort of day I’d look back upon & wonder how I got through it, I really thought things would be pretty good. It was a very long day yesterday & was made even longer by the chaos emanating from home, calls, picture messages etc. Chrissea had text-ed to let me know she & Sami wouldn’t be back up last night & 18 had picture messaged a first look at her second lip piercing, in the words of M.A. one of my favorite co-workers: “Does she not want to ever have a job?” 18 then text-ed to let me know they’d finished off the kerosene, that the heater was ‘full’ but there was no more. I was ok about that because I thought the heater was full & I’d be able to warm up in the morning before going out the door to get more!

When I arrived home I found the heater already out of kerosene. So I knew I wasn’t going to get much done in the morning. 11 was asleep on the couch, which I knew didn’t bode well, I essentially went right to bed & knew no more until 11 woke me up to say she was still sick & laid down with me for a few minutes, she was feeling miserable & coughing up a storm, I got out the good cough medicine (the stuff with the pain killers in it, that the doctor gave me to give her over the summer when she was in pain from the enlarged lymph nodes) She took a dose, reluctantly, but she did it & went up to her own bed & slept for about 5 hours straight, I visited with 8 for a few minutes before the bus came, 18 came down & visited until her ride came & then I went back to sleep.

I know I’ve been burning the candle at both ends lately (getting to bed closer to 2 or 3 instead of 1 am most nights just lately) but I’m embarrassed to say how late I slept, when I got up & saw to my horror just how late it was I got dressed immediately & went to get 11 up, it’s nice to be able to go upstairs, because she didn’t hear me at all when I called to her from the bottom of the stairs!

She opted to go with me to the store for kerosene & to get warm in the car, but we dallied, I got back into bed & drank my breakfast stuff while talking to her & called legal aid, I didn’t get through at first & so cut the legs on a pair of jeans I recently bought for 11, (the school has rules now about the bagginess of the legs of the jeans & she can’t wear them if they bag up more than just a little- I hate it because she & 8 grow so quickly & if I make the cut & they have a growth spurt I’ve wasted these jeans. (yes, I can hear my grandmother telling me to hem them up & then I could just let them down as the kids grow taller, but they’re flared legs, hemming would make them look very funny in my opinion)

I tried the legal aid people a second time & got them on the phone, they said that the age at which a child can make their own decision on which parent they want to stay with is 14 & the custody order would still supersede that unless I was amenable to a change, they said with the custody order in hand if the ex refused to relinquish the kids at the end of a visit I could go right to the police, either here or in NC & they would take the kids back for me. The woman I spoke to was a paralegal & said she had to double check the answers to some of my other questions & that she’d call me back, she also said if she hadn’t called my by tomorrow afternoon to call her back, which I could only do during break. (& my break is 145 tomorrow which is, I doubt, what she meant by afternoon)

My look for the 80’s, ah & I thought is was fat back then!

We went off to town in the car, me playing more of my random 80’s & 90’s music Cd’s the ex gave me, I didn’t even know he liked Frankie Goes to Hollywood! There are many, varied types of these Cd’s in this collection of his, ‘Heart of Metal,’ ‘Road Songs,’ ‘Best of the 80’s’ & so on, Many of them, I can tell what songs he bought them for but some of them, as I play them for this, the first time all I can think is ‘WTF were you thinking here dude?’ Oh well, it widens my own collection & I’m hearing more than a few of these for the first time in 12-15 years so it’s all good.

We took the long way to town, just for something to do because though it was cold today, it was sunny & bright, we stopped at the bank & encountered only one open lane at the drive through, which did give me time to write the check, even with all that time to wait (5 cars ahead of me when we joined the line) I still forgot to sign the back of the check, the teller, who is always there, despairs of me. After getting a look at my usual place to buy kerosene (it was, at this point after noon & too busy to go to,) we drove back over to the other place which is cheaper than the near-to-my- house store for kerosene (we’re talking 30 cents a gallon cheaper, it makes a difference, I got milk, 11 a water & the all important Sobe lean & we headed home, congratulating ourselves with a quick in & out trip to town.

Partway back home I got to thinking about the water filter again & thought maybe there really was a missing gasket, so I stopped at the hardware store which sells the filter brand that the house has (there are 3 hardware stores in the county, but only this one has this type of filter) the guy behind the counter seemed to remember me from my past two visits (in the last 2 weeks!) & confirmed that there is supposed to be an ‘o-ring’ between the filter jar & the top piece (which is exactly where the water was spraying out from) I confirmed which of the filter models was in my basement & he found me the correct o-ring.

I bounced home in a fit of excitement ‘I can do this myself’ I thought, ‘I don’t need the plumber, I don’t have to wait for the back child support to come through, I will have a shower tonight & I won’t have to go down to the basement to turn the water off afterwards either! I can do this easy peasy & it won’t cost me any more than the $3.99 I just paid for this 0-ring!”

We arrived home & 11 brought the o-ring, the milk & the drinks in to the house & I lugged the kerosene in & got the heater filled & literally had the book of matches in my hand to light the heater when the phone rang. It was 18, moaning that she now has what 11 & 8 have had & could I come get her? Augh! I just made the 20+ mile round trip to town! I told her she had crummy timing & didn’t light the heater & 11 & I got back in the car & went to get 18. She was outside waiting when we got there & introduced me to yet another of her friends. (to me it seems like she has hundreds, though I admit to having been socially inept & having only 6 or 7 friends at her age, after all, due to homeschooling I didn’t know anyone & even in the groups I was in & at work, most people were already in cliques etc & didn’t want me to join them)

When we arrived home (Again) I finally lit the heater & took laundry out to hang on the clothesline, along with the o-ring, I went straight to the basement to install my lovely new o-ring & wonder of wonders, I couldn’t get the filter jar off. If you recall, the first person I had try to do so didn’t want to try too hard because he was worried about breaking the pipes leading to & away from the filter, I knew I wasn’t strong enough to do it & so gave up for the moment expecting that 18’s BF would be home at 4:15 or so & could do it for me.

I hung the laundry on the line, cleaned up the kitchen a little (as best I could without water that is) & started scanning pictures & doing the stuff I needed to do on the computer. I never got to visit a single other person’s blog today, just checking email & doing routine maintenance over at The Fretting Zoo was more than enough, because as I discovered to my horror soon after sitting down at the computer desk, the mouse’s left click button was broken, it worked, but after every third or fourth click it would fall off & I’d have to reinstall it! I think one of the speakers on top of the monitor fell off & landed on the button.

I immediately knew I would require another mouse, that’s not something I could wait on. Though I wasn’t about to go right out because I had to pick up 8 at school at 4pm after remediation, I went alone to do that & then we checked the p.o. box & came back home, Chrissea & Sami showed up & we all visited & I got another 15 minutes on the computer & 18’s BF came home & I dragged him right out to the basement, he tried to finesse the filter jar off, tried to coax it & nudge it, it wasn’t happening & then the worst happened, the outflow pipe snapped.

I was actually sort of relieved when it happened, I decided we’d bypass the filter & just run a straight pipe where the filter was, (this sort of thing isn’t hard to do- I already had the glue after all & I’ve done plenty of this sort of thing both in the trailer & here- when 11 broke the hot water pipe under the sink in the bathroom for instance) I set the BF to sawing through the other side of the filter’s joining pipe, checked the pipe & saw it was 3/4 inch & with mr 8 along for the ride, I set out to go back to the hardware store where I’d purchased the o-ring to get some pipe.

I encountered an even more helpful person this time who sold me a 12 inch piece of 3/4 inch pipe & 2 joiners for it. 8 made the acquaintance of the hardware store cat who looks like our cat Scarlett but has green eyes instead of yellow. I was still feeling like this would work out, not having a filter isn’t good but if it worked long enough for me to get that bonus money that is supposed to be coming from child support enforcement out of the ex’s tax refund, then I could have the plumber fix my patch job & install the water filter under the sink where he says most normal people’s filters are located to make it easier to change regularly – my under sink pipes could use some work anyway because the drain parts haven’t been right since I changed the faucets. So no big deal at all.

We arrived home to find the BF in the basement still sawing at the pipe with my hacksaw (the blade on the hacksaw was installed by the ex, I think, before 8 was even born) With 8 & I supporting the filter & The other part of the pipe he was able to cut through it finally, then we set about putting the new pipe in, immediately it became apparent that I hadn’t looked at the pipe as carefully as I thought I had, oh the outgoing side was 3/4 inch, but the part coming from the well pump was one inch pipe. I was thoroughly frustrated at that point & It was 5 past 5 so the hardware store was already closed, I sent the BF & 18 to the Village Mart because they have a fairly good emergency plumbing department.

While they were gone I got the 3/4 inch end all put together & glued, it wasn’t great because there was about 1/4 inch of 3/4 pipe sticking out of the next joiner, I glued the joiner I’d purchased in place & then measured & cut the piece of pipe so all I needed to do was put in the piece the BF & 18 were sent to get. They came back with something which was 1 inch on both ends, but had screw threads in one end which the BF thought we might be able to use, we filled the excess with glue & used yet more plumbers tape to make it sturdier & then left it.

The glue can said 2 hours minimum to dry before putting any pressure on the joins so Chrissea & I set out for C’Burg to get a mouse & pick up a 1 inch to 3/4 inch pipe joiner just in case the thing we did didn’t work. We got gas, went to Lowes & say my former MIL who surprised me by saying that she felt the ex has changed, I told her about my discussion with legal aid & she was fairly positive about the whole thing. We got the pipe joiner, a new hacksaw blade, light bulbs & some more tub caulk because my tub is a mess & all the caulking is tearing away from the tub & the wall.

Then over to Best buy where I got a fairly cool mouse for $20, (At least it’s an optical, no ball, I hate those & I already have to deal with one 43 hours a week at work) 18 & the BF had given me $2 for a dollar menu burger for each of them (no one but 11, Sami & Chrissea liked the pasta bake which in between all this plumbing nightmare I was coaching 11 on how to make tonight for dinner) I got myself a burger from the dollar menu & my 5th or 6th diet coke of the day (I may never sleep again)

We drove home & decided between us, 18 & the BF that the time had come to try the water pipes. The BF went down to turn the water on & came back to say it was leaking worse than the filter had been. While we were discussing whether we could run it long enough for me to get a shower & the dishes to be done 18 started yelling that there was a weird noise coming from the basement, the BF & I ran outside, I only looked through the basement window, the BF went in, water was spewing out of the outflow pipe, it had blown out the whole patch job we did.

See that white thing in the top center of the pic? That’s my lovely hot water heater from November- Fat lot of good it’s doing me right now!

Now there’s about 5 inches of water on the low end of my basement floor again (this makes 3 times now for those keeping score at home) I am fed up, completely beaten by the plumbing & will be taking a sponge bath with a facecloth which I’ve soaked with water from my spare water jugs & microwaved to warm it (Yech) Home-ownership is very nice, no one can tell you you can’t have 4 cars in your yard, a huge dog, 4 cats & 7 people living at your house (that’s what we currently have, among other things) but on the other hand, there’s no landlord to call upon in this situation.

Many Kudos to my mother who is wiring me (hopefully) enough money to get the plumber out here either tomorrow or Friday at the latest (I think 18 will flip out & kill someone if she doesn’t get a real shower before Friday- maybe I’d better have her ask a friend to let her use theirs) Things could always be worse, though I’m not too sure I can think of how just now…. Maybe if the whole house was submerged, not just the basement? Yeah, I guess it could be worse.

Of course, I’m still speechless. Everyone’s ok & that’s the important thing

So it was a little windy here in VA on Sunday

That tree from December 2006, it finally finished falling.

When 18 called to tell me she said it as if the kitchen was full of tree, really there’s only this little hole in the roof (about 3 feet by 4 inches)

Then this lovely branch plunged through the garage roof.

but the real damage is upstairs…

in 18’s room, this is directly over her bed & you can see daylight & tree.

This was in that left corner above the bed 18 was sitting on the near side of the bed when it happened & all the kids, plus Chrissea’s daughter Sami were upstairs at the time.

Here’s some daylight, can’t see the tree though

From the side of the house, you can see where that second half of tree sheared off & fell on the house.

You can really get an idea of just how big this dumb tree was from this angle. (maybe it’s a smart tree, I think it’s been gunning for me since we moved in to tell the truth)

18’s bf climbed out on the roof to give us theselovely views of the mess, looking back toward 18’s bedroom window from the garage roof

& down the roof toward the back of the house, that’s the lights in my kitchen through the window over the sink you can see down at the bottom right of the picture.

Now if I can just get enough money from the insurance co. to take the rest of the scary tall trees back there down, along with replacing the roof & fixing all 3 holes! It could become a blessing in disguise in the long run.

& others, along with other tales from my Very Busy Tuesday.

Tuesday started for me in the car driving home & arriving at quarter past 12 am to find Chrissea, her daughter & their dog just arriving at our house too- for a pre-planned visit for Chrissea’s & my mutual Tuesday off. We came in the house to be greeted by 17 who was waiting up to greet us & hang out. We all ended up sitting around chatting until after 1 am at which time 17 & Chrissea’s daughter went upstairs, Chrissea went to bed to read & I watched my news on dvr before going to bed too. When I went to bed I could still hear 17 & Chrissea’s daughter talking up a storm from upstairs.

The kids were kind to me & were quiet on the way out to school in the morning so the first thing I knew it was 930 & I had to get up to eat breakfast & get ready to go to H&R block to get my taxes done. I had done a refund predictor thing on the same company’s web site & was expecting something around $3k back. Last year was around 4k & they had warned me that with 17 turning 17 I would be ineligible for 1 credit for her & would lose $1000. in refunds because of it. So 3k sounded right to me.

I was amused to find not a single cat downstairs at all. That probably had something to do with Chrissea’s humongous German Shepard Toby lounging on my living room floor. He was pleased to see me but really wanted me to help him get up the ladder stairs to the upstairs where the cats were apparently ensconced. Since I don’t even climb the ladder stairs I was unable to oblige.I was gratified to see that the ice, snow & freezing rain they had been predicting on the news the night before was no-where to be seen & though it was gray & cloudy it was over 40 & not raining or otherwise precipitating.

Off I went to H&R block where the same, very kind & lovely hippie type lady who’s been doing my taxes for at least the last 4 years was waiting for me. We went through the usual range of questions, anyone disabled? Everyone still in school? Any change of residence or employment etc & so on, until it was established that the bonuses my company gives out in addition to my new hourly wage conspired to reduce my refund by not approximately $1k but by 2k. I was disappointed to say the least but what can you do. We went over it 3 times & there was nothing there that she missed. I tried the rebate predictor on the website again after I got home & it showed exactly what she had come up with too so I don’t know what happened but it was wrong 2 weeks ago when I tried it the first time.

I settled in the bank parking lot before cashing my refund check (I do rapid refund- I know it costs money, but it is worth it when you’re getting shut off notices on your electric bill & paying late fees on other bills) I had to re-do the finances. Now it looks like the whole stairs plan is going to have to wait – yet again- though, since I was upset & frustrated already I decided to talk to child support enforcement because they always put me in that mood so they, at least couldn’t do much damage.

They were pretty cool, I had to give them the ex’s address which he willingly gave me a couple of weeks ago & which I hadn’t gotten around to calling them with. I asked about the arrears amount (he owes me more than my tax refund amounted to- sadly) & they said he was scheduled for ’special collection action’ which means he’ll lose his tax refund this year again (4 years in a row- can you say yee hah? I can!) They also explained that the reason they’ve had to hold it 6 months previously was because he filed taxes jointly with his wife. So I speculated that since he’s divorcing, he might be filing single this year. That would mean that I’d have the money pretty quick. I’m not saying a word to him about it I’ll just be checking out the automated system on the child support thing weekly from now on.

I arrived home to find Chrissea, 17 & Sami waiting for me. We decided to go get a light, quick lunch & went back to town to DJ’s drive in for burgers with the expectation that we’d be going out all together for a nice big meal as an early celebration for 17’s birthday after 11 & 8 arrived home from school & 17’s boyfriend got out of work. 8’s teacher called to tell me she was worried about getting home because of the inclement weather expected later in the day & was canceling the remediation class for the afternoon so we went back to the house to await 8 arriving by bus. 11’s teacher lives in town & was unconcerned so we still had to wait for her to finish her remediation & pick her up at the school at 4.

17 had the driving bug & really wanted to drive around & practice. We’d all been discussing old times & so decided a drive up to the old rental house we lived in when we first moved back to Floyd in 1997 was in order. While we were driving 17 was feeling hypersensitive to everything I said, when I asked her to get off the edge of the road she bitched about me being too critical of her driving & nit picking every move she made. So, when we went to make the left turn onto the road which leads to the road the old house is on, I didn’t say anything about the ditch.

The turn onto the road (Buffalo Mountain Road) is a hard left & the road immediately dips down & does a little turn, if you don’t turn just right, there is a very deep ditch on the right hand side of the road. The last time 17 & I had taken this ride with her driving I had said something about watching out for the ditch & gotten an earful about ”I lived off this road for 2 years, I rode the school bus back & forth all that time, mom, I know the road, duh, I know there’s a ditch there” so, in light of the diatribe I’d sparked 3 miles back up the road I kept my mouth shut.

And she drove right into the ditch! It was, like all car accidents etc. in slow motion, I watched her turn & started to say- you’re too far to the right & then we were down in it & she yanked the wheel to the left, somehow the car went airborne for a split second, there was a large bang & we landed on the road partway- headed for the other side of the road, she yanked the wheel right & straightened out (something she’s not been all that good at so far- up until yesterday when it really counted) & we kept on going. Me worrying about my nice new (barely a week in my possession) car’s suspension, tires, gas tank et. al. Chrissea thanking heavens she was in the back & didn’t see what happened exactly, 8 wide eyed & staring & Sami chattering excitedly about the whole thing. We were going to stop at the private church school up the road but there was a car parked there & I didn’t want gawkers so we drove all the way to the old house, past it to the church & parked in the parking lot to survey the damage.

There was no damage! not a scratch, dent or ding, none of the tires were hissing & leaking air & no smell of gas from a cracked gas tank. 17 said she was glad it had happened because she felt like now that she’d had something bad happen & had been able to handle it without serious injury she’d be better prepared next time. I was not happy but what’s done is done & since there was no damage we went along- Chrissea drove us – she hadn’t driven my new car before then- to the elementary to get 11 & we all went back home to await 17’s BF’s arrival, then, in 2 separate cars (17 driving her BF’s car) we went to C’burg where we had planned to eat at the new Olive Garden. The wait, however was 55 minutes – which is crazy for a Tuesday so we went to Outback steak house, were seated immediately & had a great time at a table for 7.

When we left to go home 17 & the BF went to spend some of her birthday money (the tradition is that when my tax refund comes in I give her her birthday money then & she picks out her own gifts- it began when she was 8 or 9 & so picky the ex & I didn’t dare buy her anything for fear she wouldn’t like it) I was more than a little concerned when she called me to ask me about bleach. Sure enough she came home with a bleach kit & TEAL (?) hair dye.

It turned out Sami had hair color she’d talked her mom into getting for her & so they had a little hair dyeing party, I did the tipping with bleach that 17 wanted but the stuff she bought was weak & didn’t lift right, over an hour later she was still pale orange, not white. My advice was to wait until Friday, go get a better bleach kit, re-tip & then put in the teal color, she insisted she had to go to school with teal hair tomorrow & put the teal in anyway, resulting in an odd greenish tinge.

We all played rummy & then the school bound went to bed & Chrissea read again, I watched the news in horror (I didn’t watch the national news Monday night, only the local for the weather & was completely in the dark about the whole stock market crisis.) A good time was had by all really & I’ve barely spent any of my refund yet (If you don’t count paying the electric bill & writing out, but not mailing, a bunch of checks for bills)

Lol, Purists would say I still don’t understand with my new car!

Click here to see my new car at the dealership (!!!) (scroll down on that link for the specs.) It was a lot less painful than expected I have to admit, it’s so much nicer when you can browse online & choose the car you want before you go. They only had one Jeep Compass so I didn’t have to make much of a choice about it. After reading the specs. on the Jeep Liberty, Hyundai Santa Fe & Tucson- this one had the best gas mileage. Combined with the high-rollover tendency in the Liberty’s, (I live in mountains & the curves can be literal killers) This was the car I really wanted.

And I got it! We walked in, they sat us in the guy who is in charge of the Internet sales’ office & then he came in, looked over my paperwork. I’ve lost my title to my PT Cruiser- it wasn’t in the file folder with all the other paperwork from my cars through the years- though I could swear I remember putting it in there!- cost me $5. at the DMV later in the day to get a new one so I could sign it over to the dealership!

He then gave me the keys to the Jeep, wrote up a temporary registration for 2 hours & explained that he had another couple of people there he was working with & would rather we went for a long drive & came back at the end of the 2 hours! It was 11:30 by then & 11 & 8 were hungry so we drove around, went to the bank, sat in the bank parking lot & I checked out some of the salient points of the owners manual & features of the car.

It has a back light in the trunk which has a flashlight attachment that you can pull out & use outside of the car- & features in the dash which tell you what sort of MPG your car is getting while you drive certain ways, speeds etc. a read out for the psi on your tires & a readout for how many miles you can drive on the gas left in your tank, the trunk area is a plastic piece which lifts out for spare tire access rather than carpeted space- which I will prefer, since I haul my own trash to the dumpsters here in Floyd Co. it got to smell after awhile, I’ve used so many bottles of febreze in my last car that it’s not even funny.

We had lunch at McDonalds, I made a few phone calls to resolve a couple of bills (including my satellite tv bill- which is to the company I work for- this counts later on) & we took a drive down the highway & back on a circuitous mountain road so I could check out how it would handle in my day to day driving. Then back to the dealership where they were not quite ready to see us- 11 & 8 played charades & ran around the (thankfully unoccupied) waiting room- which I think got the sales guy moving a little more quickly, I signed a bunch of paperwork (most of which was pre-printed from the information I’d filled out online already- very convenient) & we went to the business office across the street (this place is huge, multiple new car sales concerns & then tons of used cars plus their own garage, quick lube, RV & truck sales)

At the business office we waited in the car while the sales man went in & talked to the guy who did the discussing of the money & the interest rate etc, then waited in the waiting area (with a giant screen tv which the receptionist obligingly put on Disney channel for my kids- since we were the only people there.) Chrissea called which was nice, she told me what was going on in her life which kept me from worrying about the whole how-am-I-going-to-pay-for-this? thing. (a little)

The Old car.

Then I went in & heard what the damage was, I probably shouldn’t have agreed to it. But the interest rate is good & I can always trade it in a few years, as it stands though, I did go for the full coverage warranty, which is for 3 years or 36k miles, if anything goes wrong it’s covered, & the gap insurance where it will cover a replacement car if I totaled it- not just what the insurance covers but the whole thing- a good idea here in deer with a death wish country.

We waited awhile after that, they were detailing the car at the same time so we had to wait while they finished that. I called my insurance company to get the insurance switched over & we went back with the salesman to his office, cleaned out our old car & said goodbye to it. (mr 8 kissed it right above the gas cap- which I found particularly ironic as that’s one thing I won’t miss!)

We took care of the title stuff right away because I had to sign a paper that said if I didn’t produce it in 3 business days they’d bill me the money they gave me as trade in on the car- not much, let me tell you (I didn’t pay a cent of cash down this time, I couldn’t due to the lack of tax refund in my hands currently) & I really won’t complain too much because as I’ve mentioned before, the car had 145 thousand miles on it, a ruined back trunk hatch, a busted back bumper with broken tail light, a clunk in the front end which was either
a bad u-joint or a bad strut- I don’t want to know.

We arrived home & checked the mail, moved the cds & other things which we’d unloaded from the old car this morning, into the new car. (all but the tapes, this car’s stereo is cd only, no tape deck at all :^( yet another reason to get a new computer soon so I can burn my own mix cds & give up the tapes forever!) While we were doing this my phone rang, at first I wasn’t going to answer it because it said ‘unavailable’ but I thought 17’s friend’s house, being down the mountain might not have cell phone service for 17 to be able to call from her cell & that it might be her calling from the friend’s home phone so I answered.

It was my company, a quality assurance person was calling me back to discuss my customer service experience when I called to make my payment! I had talked shop with the woman who took my payment, asked specifically when my employee credit would be applied this month- (so as to make sure it would be before they shut me off- because of course, I only paid the part of the bill I had to pay minus the credit I receive)

My first words to this quality guy were ‘dude- don’t you check the records? I’m an employee!’ They can’t ask employees for feedback on this because we’re too sympathetic to the person on the phone (why couldn’t have they called me for feedback on the call I made to get a new remote back last summer, when they first told me I didn’t have warranty coverage & then after I set them straight & told them where to look in the computer program to prove I was indeed in warranty, sent me a set top box instead of the remote I needed!)

He explained that the ID #s on the account, because I didn’t sign up for it as an employee weren’t the sort they’re supposed to be to help the computer program filter employees out of their call back thing. He confirmed I have the employee credits on the account & I told him I thought the woman who took my payment was wonderful (she waived the $5. transaction fee we charge to take a live credit card payment without my having to ask her to do so! So of course I thought she was great!)

After making dinner with leftover ham that 17 cooked last night & rice I’ve been on here ever since, I’ve offered to go get 17 at her friend’s house so as to get to drive the car again tonight & am currently waiting on her call!

So I’m feeling a little better, the well seems to be ok, it just cost me over $400. & a new water heater & to find that out. However, it’s better than the minimum $5 grand to dig a new well.

I’m 39 today & it’s not setting well at all. I am somewhat comforted that when my mother turned my age I, her oldest kid was 8 years old & my very youngest is 8 now, meaning that I’ll be done with the whole child rearing thing a lot earlier than she was. I am discomforted though, by the idea that I’m going to be 40 next year & have very little to show for it.

My ‘lovely’ birthday, so far, has consisted of being woken up by miss 17 calling to tell me she felt like she was going to puke at 8 am, my telling her to tough it out & getting yelled at for my coldness, then trying to go back to sleep, only to have the phone ring less than 5 minutes later, the plumber calling to say he’d be over in 10 minutes. Karma was obviously telling me to get out of bed- it’s a good thing I was too depressed last night to stay online for any amount of time last night & so was in bed reasonably early (for me).

Within an hour the school called to let me know that 17 had, indeed puked. So off to town to pick her up at the high school, I went to the bank to get money out for my trip to Mt Airy tomorrow- (on which I have decided to try to pick out something for myself, I don’t know what yet, there were myriad things that I saw on our last trip that I really liked- but narrowing it down to one can be really hard.) then came back home after a Sobe stop -if I have to be up at 8 am on a day off (third one in a row now that I didn’t get to sleep in during- there’s a trend here & I don’t like it) The least I can ask for is caffeine.

When I got back home the plumber announced the water’s on, the hot water heater is heating up, our pressure is back to normal, the water filter must be changed monthly not quarterly & what I owed him.

Of course, that was the last of the money for the car repairs. So now I’m seriously thinking about other cars. That or resigning myself to driving with a broken trunk latch at least until the end of January because that’s when I’ll have the kind of money it will cost for that kind of repair.

17 has taken herself off to her room, angry with me because I don’t know where her SAT test is given. I also have no interest in getting her 30 miles away over there in Blacksburg by 730 am on Saturday- that’s what her BF is for I told her- she says since neither he or she has any idea of where the place is I ‘have’ to help her out. As if I’ve ever done anything at Virginia Tech other than drive by it! Funny how we’re so independent & separate until we’re confronted with something out of our range of knowledge & then we go running back to Mommy.I’d like to know why they can’t give SAT tests here in town? Also, she’s got friends who have already taken the test & also probably, friends who will be taking the test on Saturday, it seems to me that it would be smart to ask around & get directions, or try to get a ride with a friend (everyone but her has their licence after all- or so she tells me all the time- so certainly one of them should be able to give her a ride!)

I know, I’m messed up! Most parents are worrying about how to help their kids do better etc. I’m worrying about having to get up at the ungodly hour of 6 am to take her to take the test. A lot of this is the defeatist thoughts in my head right now, I can’t pay for her to go to college, I can barely keep a roof over our heads & food on the table so why sweat the SATs? if she goes at all it’ll be to the community college to start & (according to her) you don’t seem to need your SAT scores to go there at all.

I’m still irked about the whole weekend. After years of screaming at me over the phone about my not letting him have the kids in WI, insisting he pay child support, & my not letting him take the kids wherever he wanted, the ex was insanely pleasant, accommodating & stated 5 or 6 times that he bore me no ill will.

Of course, I think it’s all a ruse, I gathered from conversation had around/in front of me, that the new girlfriend is studying law, so I’m thinking the whole thing is a ‘getting ready for a custody/visitation court case’ run through. When I arrived on Thursday night he was apologetic that we haven’t received child support – he says they’re taking it out of him for sure, I offered to call the 1800 # for the VDCSE & let him listen to the notice that no money has been collected or dispersed on my case in 30+ days, he declined & said that he thinks it’s going to his new ex wife.

Then, Saturday the kids & I cleaned house & watched movies together, expecting his call all day long because he’d said he wanted to take them out & do something on that day, he never called & of course, that was right after I’d discovered at 10 pm on Friday night, that I had a basement full of water, so I was waiting on the plumber to show up, finally at 5pm I called the ex to see what was going on & he said he’d been busy all day installing his mother’s carpet & had forgotten about seeing the kids (I’m sorry, doesn’t it seem like if you’re visiting the area for the first time in 18 + months & you have young kids that seeing them would be a larger priority than your mother’s carpet?)

So, he didn’t feel like coming up to our house or going out to dinner (with no water I was not about to try to cook) so I ended up taking the kids to his moms & leaving them there for 4 hours to have dinner there & visit with their dad, while I went home to deal with the plumber after a quick stop to get paper plates, antibacterial wash & hand wipes.

While visiting when I dropped the kids off, I explained the plumbing problem & he asked why I hadn’t called him first thing in the morning “I could’ve fixed this for you today & you wouldn’t have to wait until Monday to have water – plus I’m cheaper than a plumber” is what he said & when I expressed the idea that I doubted he wanted to do plumbing work on his time off & that I hardly expected him to help me with that sort of thing. He said he had nothing against me & of course he’d help out.

He then asked if I’d had the stairs done yet & I explained that I had yet to find anyone who was willing to build them when I’d had the money to pay to have them done. He said as soon as I got my tax refund he’d come up & build them for me. Again, I said I wasn’t about to ask that of him & he insisted that he wanted to help us out. We got to discussing other things I need done on my house & he continued in this vein. (anything he could do to help, just call, he’s only going to be 2 hours away & he’ll be around a lot more now, etc etc,)

As a co-worker who is a child of divorce pointed out, his dad used to do the same thing, get a guilt attack & make all kinds of promises then renege, or at the very least not follow through. I hope he’s serious but, as with everything the ex does & says, I have to temper my hope with a grain of salt because history has proved him untrustworthy at least 70% of the time. (& we are talking about knowing him for all but 8 of his 34 years. That’s a pretty long history.)

All in all, so far, it’s not a particularly auspicious beginning to my last year in my thirties. Maybe it’ll be one of those ‘get better as the year progresses’ sort of things.

Not too bad for nearly 40 & nothing but sponge baths for 6 days!

So everything is going along nicely, looks like Christmas should be good this year, I know where the money’s coming from for the gifts, I have the holiday off by default & was able to request the day before off also. I should know by the second of December if I’ll have the 24th off or not.

Thanksgiving is coming along nicely, 17 is excited about cooking, we’ve got the stuff for a whole meal, including stuff for her to make a pumpkin pie (which I hate) She’s excited even, about making Thanksgiving dinner & 11 & 8 are excited about helping. 11’s got a project due tomorrow in which she needs to make an edible ‘mixture’ or ‘compound’ she made brownies. All by herself too! 8 is doing really well in school just lately & has learned the benefits of doing his homework on the bus on the way home- friends with the same assignments to help & when he gets off the bus he has the rest of the afternoon to himself.

With the pay raise etc at work I’m feeling a little better about my job (though the rumor that we have a wage ‘cap’ of $31.500. a year & that no hourly wage employee can go above that is a little frightening) the calls are the same but at least I know I’ll be more richly rewarded, even if I only get the $2 increase it would still equal $160 extra in my biweekly paychecks! & that’s something to show for my annoyance & frustration. I also found out that I got a bonus this month, for the first month in a few of them- Finally!

I have my Birthday, Monday 11/26 off so I can laze around the house & howl, wail & bemoan the onset of my final year in my 30’s, (I may be glad to see them go, considering how unpleasantly things have turned out) Then, on the 27th, my normal day off, I have plans to go to NC & pick up some Christmas gifts for friends & family with a co-worker who also says they’re taking me out to lunch in honor of my birthday. (Very excited about that! let me tell you)

So everything is great right? up until 9 pm at least it was! When I went on my last break at 9pm tonight I found I had a voice mail waiting for me, it wasn’t from 17, who would usually text message, not leave a message, nor was it from Chrissea or anyone else I knew, when I saw the 910 area code I thought it might be a friend who’s recently moved to North Carolina but when I checked the message I found it was from the EX. He’s in SC in the army. I guess the powers that be haven’t heard my prayers that he be shipped overseas somewhere that I wouldn’t have to deal with him.

I mean really- he called on Labor Day. That’s the last time we’ve heard from him, by phone or by email, so we’re looking at about 10 weeks. Add to that, the child support he said I’d be getting hasn’t come through, not a cent, & the birthday cards & gift cards he promised 11 & 8 haven’t showed up either. One co-worker, when I was bemoaning his stepping back in suggested I tell him he’s welcome to come for Turkey day as long as he comes bearing gifts & gift cards for the kids!

Because that’s what he wants, he’s ‘going to be in the area’ for Thanksgiving & wants to get together with the kids. Arrrrgh! I have to work Wednesday & Thursday & we’re supposed to be going to take 17’s BF to get his new car from his parents on Friday. Not conducive to a visit with Mr (neglectful) father of the year. (especially since he thinks ‘his girls shouldn’t date ’til they’re 40′ & 17 & her BF tell people all the time they’re affianced & correct me when I say boyfriend & girlfriend to fiancee they say they’re getting married this summer- to circumvent the college of 17’s choice’s requirement that freshman live in dorms unless there are extenuating circumstances)

I would like to know where he’s staying while he’s here (so I can firebomb it) I am really hoping this is an ‘on the way back to WI’ trip for him & that he’s getting shipped overseas asap. Preferably to a war zone, but halfway around the world for 3 years should be ok for me too! I am hoping someone in the family- his but they live closer to me- will help me out & keep 11 & 8 with them for the holiday so I don’t have to worry about him here at my house making judgments on my housekeeping & the kerosene heater.

Because you see, if he gets assigned to NC where he’s requesting he be assigned, I’ll have to deal with this crap every single holiday & then he’ll put in for a joint custody thing- which I will have to fight & then I’ll get verbally abused by him & nit-picked about every little thing from my weight to how much tv the kids or I watch. Oh I’m getting sick just thinking about it. Enough already. Time for me to go to bed.